Force to the Bathroom at Coachella
I effect it. You achieve it. Your mom does it. Dogs as well! We ALL act it. Every interval.
I'm talking approximately going to the bathroom. Relieving yourself. Captivating attention of bag.
It's a lucid, basic, bodily work.
Unfortunately, in Coachella-land, not everything is as no problem and basic as it is in our general lives. Especially going to the bathroom. At Coachella, it can be perfectly an adventure... (or nightmare!)
The Empire Polo Earth facilities were not designed to accomodate all the more else than 100 tribe, let alone 100,000. So how conclude festival organizers assemble up for it? With port-o-potties... You can use them to wipe down a seat before you sit down, clean your hands when you're done, or even use them to... umm... wipe yourself if you find yourself in a porto with no TP.5. YOU CAN'T PEE IF YOU CAN'T SEE.
Engage in the maths... provided you're sharing 200 portos with 70,000 other clan, that's by oneself one porto for every 350 general public! And all the more though the interior of one of these stinky, vile, gross, brief plastic upright coffins is equitable approximately the Endure field on world you desire to be, you'll be surprised how flying you'll transform your tune when bottom line calls. And you'll carry piece of competition, on account of Each environing you is chugging moisten and slamming beers and scarfing down chilli cheese fries...
It's all effects of the intimacy of going to Coachella, or any bop festival for that complication. You'll survive... aloof pursue these steps.
Instructions
1. DON'T WAIT Further Great! When you bow motility allied you might hog to animation soon, don't procrastinate! Whether you wait until you you're approximately to burst, and then hog to stand in a far-reaching path for the portos... It's gonna be the longest, most depressing 15 minutes of your brio.
2. Be read WHERE THE PORT-O-POTTIES ARE. Glance at the map and detect where the groups of portos are. Oooh-la-la... Keep walking past the long lines at that first group of portos and make a beeline for one of the other 2 areas, where lines are shorter.
3. SLIP AROUND THE BACK. The typical configuration for the 3 groups of portos inside the festival are 2 long rows facing each other, covered by a sun shade and forming a sort of "hallway" so to speak. When it's busy, people tend to queue up at the front of this hallway, but sometimes you can walk around the whole thing and sneak through the back opening. Worth a try, especially if you ignored Step 1.
4. BABY WIPES ARE YOUR FRIEND. If you've read my "Stay Clean at Coachella" article, you already know how I feel about handi-wipes or baby wipes... they're a must-have. And they can be very handy when you're inside of a porto. LOTS of them... rows and rows. I've never absolutely counted them, on the other hand I'm guessing there's probably another than 200 "portos" at Coachella.Nevertheless it never seems to be Sufficiently.
After the sun goes down, it can get pretty dark inside some of the portos. The upside to this is that you won't be able to see that horrific visual when you catch a glimpse of what's inside the tank under the seat (it's enough to give you post-traumatic stress syndome, I tell ya!) The downside is you can't see what the hell you're doing, and could end up peeing environing your shoes, or touching something you really don't want to touch, or worse. If you have a glowstick or a little penlight or LED that you can wear around your neck or clip to your shirt, it can provide just enough illumination to let you see where you should aim. Or sit. Or hover.
6. THERE ARE A FEW "REAL" TOILETS. If you've led a very sheltered life and the thought of using a port-o-potty is just too awful, there are alternatives. There are usually a couple trailer-style portos (each with a men's room and women's room) with flushable toilets. For the past couple years they've had one just inside the main entrance, and I think there might be another around somewhere too... not sure. Naturally, the lines are longer for these, but for some people it's worth the wait.
7. IT'S MUCH BETTER IN VIP. You get what you get, and if you can shell out the benjamins to hang with the beautiful people backstage in VIP, there's a definite step up in bathroom quality. The port-o-potties there are in trailers, and are like, real bathrooms, with stalls and sinks and soap and stuff. In 2006, there were 3 leading locations inside the festival: 1) Good inside the entrance, 2) after to the Outdoor Theater leaf, and 3) Between the Sahara tent and Mojave tent. There's as well diverse away the festival, near the entrance. In the afternoon as bourgeois are arriving, the lines for the portos equal outside the entrance and just inside the entrance can get really long. It seems the first thing most people want to do when they get inside the festival is pee.
