Whether there's one circumstance the Geico brutal commercials carry taught us, it's that cavemen would absolutely obtain a flinty generation in modern-day sovereign state. Luckily, there aren't any around--but that shouldn't location you from learning prattle allying one.
Instructions
1. Lob conventional grammer outside the cavern window. Refer to yourself in third person, use articles and pronouns sparingly and get rid of contractions altogether. Cavemen know keep things simple, because, well--they don't have any other choice.
2. Invent nonsensical grunting words like "og," "oog," "groog" and other variations that contain the letter "G."
3. Live in the present. Cavemen only refer to people, things and situations in the present tense. For instance, instead of "I learned to hunt as a small child," why not try: "Grog learn to hunt when Grog little boy."
Use a deep tone of voice when you speak to set up dominance. A caveman with a quiet, falsetto voice is likely to be the last one handed the slab of meat around the fire.4.
5. Talk about things that a caveman might do during the average run of a day, like club an animal for dinner, drag a woman back to his cave or fashion himself a nice sabre-toothed necklace.
